Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Christopher From Kentucky

It's true. Someone at the dating site thought I was compatible with Christopher from Kentucky. Unfortunately the site will not allow me to save his photos, so you will not get the full effect of this goon. Please trust me when I tell you that you are missing out on a super-sexy, v-neck shirt that accentuates some attractive chest hair. Below I have copied the text straight from his profile for your reading. In red text, I highlighted some specific topics that I felt were extra creepy. This is real.

Christopher – Louisville, Kentucky

Basic Information

Occupation: I work at the post office I sort mail *This should be two sentences. I don’t see a period.

Age: 31

Height 6 ’0”

Ethnicity: White, non-Hispanic

The most influential person in Christopher's life has been:

My older brothe he is smart with 22years of computer experience. I value his knowledge even though I don't feel he has much more than that to offer. He has a family that he puts his time into. *He states that his brother is the most influential person in his life, but he doesn’t have much to offer besides computer experience?

The three things which Christopher is most thankful for:

• haveing my own place and keeping it mostly in order have a roof over my head

• haveing a job to maintain my lifestyle even though it is just me and not spectacularI and a bit boreing half the time I don't mess around I am not a player and do what I can to keep my priorities strait even though I feel so alone *Please note…he is not a player. Imagine that.

• going to the gym when I am a member it helps to distract me from being lonely and depressed about being alone with out a special love in my life

Three of Christopher's best life-skills are:

• Being a good friend and companion

• Finding pleasure and contentment in simple things

• Managing my finances

The one thing Christopher wishes MORE people would notice about him is:

how sincear I usealy am how real I try to be. how eager to please people I feel conected to. I don't care for lies and or being fake. The farthest I go most of the time since my teens and before are white lies. I don't care for being dishonest/baldface lieing. I realy dislike baldface lieing. I want sincerity, honesty, some one trust worthy and open to being real, some one that is not a faker with their personality. how much I want chemistry in a relationship not just sex, though I do want sex I want to be loved. I wish women would see how hard I look for true love and wish women would go on a date with me to see me I need help finding love. *He is not looking for “just sex”, but he does want sex, in case you are interested.

The things Christopher can't live without are:

• a job got to have something to pass the time * Apparently he has a job to pass the time. I have a job to pay the bills.

• a roof over my head

• the hope I will find a decent woman to love

• my silly since of humor that is amuseing to me

• love, I can only be a shell of a man with out it

The first thing people notice about Christopher is:

I guess that I am an talkative, that I am outgoing open. I try to be respectful maybe that I am chipper at time. That I have a warm and easygoing personality. I am good at small talk. Maybe from time to time I am nervous around new or beautiful women when getting to know them. I like to laugh I do that a bit but some times I am quiet when feeling alone or unappreciated or wanted. cause I am lonely my hornieness gets the better of me and at time's I may try talking dirty, or about sex and or relationship stuff. I get eager wanting to talk about sex, relationship, or talking dirty when I am alone with a woman, or around other unformilar people. *I’m not even sure what to say here.

Some additional information Christopher wanted you to know is:

I want true love. I want a serious relationship. I do what I can to be real. I don't beleive in baldface lieing. I have not had many lovers/girlfriends, and want someone who has not had much more experience, or maybe less. I want a decent woman. I do what I can to be a decent man. lust is mainly important to feel wanted and cherished. I think thats the way for most everyone who wants to be wanted or desired, lust is not the only factor in a relationship, but it can be important at times. I am and have disired to being a hopeless romantic since my early to mid-teens, and live with heartach still looking for my own love. I am lost being alone

My interests

Christopher typically spends his leisure time:

T.v., vidieo games, and getting out to the movie theaters. I don't realy play vidieo games any more. I no longer have any one to play with, very regular I haven't been going to my brother's much. For the last year to a year and a half I have been trying internet dateing with little to no luck. I got a motor cycle that I have had for 2yr's and have not riden it much just have not given myself much time 4 it. I do join a gym now and again when I push myself to find time for it. I would like to get out more being alone its hard to find fun doing things alone so much. I do what I can to be a decent man. I want to be a better man.

The last book Christopher read and enjoyed:

the shanara books and some dungeons and dragons nothing real deep. I just not much of a reader. just want to be more active lately have been thinking about wanting to get more into reading? *Yay...dungeons and dragons

According to my friends:

Christopher's friends describe him as:

• Affectionate

• Hard Working

• Loyal

• Passionate

One thing that only Christopher's best friends know is:

I don't realy have a best friend any more. The best friend I have moved away towards the end of high school. He live around a hundred miles away. I have gone to see him around ten times give or take in the last 10 years maybe more. He has only come to see me once cause he had some dance to go to? He realy kindof sucks as a best friend realy. since high school. I have worked to earn a liveing. I have moved around 6 times, and have changed jobs about a handfull of times to better my situation. I may have had about 10 jobs or so since late highshool not to many in the last 5 years or so. I have not been jobless for very long in between. *Apparently his best friend sucks at being a best friend, so why is he your best friend????

I am not a  heartless person and I truly feel sad for this man. I just wonder how creepy one can actually be? And who the crap thought I would be compatible with Christopher From Kentucky?


  1. this is awesome. it's good to know there are some decent men out there.... especially one that isn't a baldface liar.

  2. Oh my goodness. He is like a gob of play-doh that has been sitting out waiting to be shaped and molded, but is starting to get hard and crusty.

  3. Hahahaha. Dungeons & Dragons, however he does work at the post office that's concerning as well.

    Love the new background!

  4. Oh my goodness. So glad to see that I'm not the only one who finds such winners via online dating! Thanks for the laugh.